Sorry, officer! My speedometer is broken!

We’ve all been there. Pulled over along side of the road waiting nervously for the police officer to amble up to our vehicle.

While waiting, my brain runs through a hundred plausible excuses as to why I was speeding.

I admit, I’ve actually never had a great reason to actually speed.

No one was ever giving birth to a baby in my back seat and I’ve never robbed a bank and attempted a high speed run to the Mexican border.

I’m just your average citizen that is either not paying attention to my speed or rushing to pick up a kid after school.

During my pre-kid era, I was pulled over so many times for speeding in Denver, Colorado that if I would have received a ticket for each time, I would have definitely lost my license. As it was, I was only ticketed once out of the seven.

How’d I do that?

Show some creativity

First of all, I think the police appreciate creativity.

I figured out a early on that police hear the same old excuses day in and day out. I try to take the mundane out of their day.

The first time I was pulled over in college, I had a hot pepperoni pizza sitting in the passenger seat. When the officer asked why I was speeding, I told the officer that if he had ever tasted Bonnie Brae Taverns’ pizza before, he would know exactly why I was speeding.

When he stated that he had passed by Bonnie Brae Tavern but had never gone inside, I gave him a slice pizza. I talked his ear off about the history of Bonnie Brae Tavern for about ten minutes and left with only a warning to slow down.

Don’t lie

I have never lied to a police officer to get out of a speeding ticket. My honest reasons for speeding seem to catch the officer off-guard.

When a police officer asks if I know how fast I was going, I always reply with a simple “yes” and give my speed. “Yes, I was going 82 in a 65. Sorry about that, sir. I have been sitting in traffic for the last hour and I really need to pee. I’m just trying to make it home. You know how that goes! I’m sure you are very busy and hardly have time to take a break yourself. I never saw you until you turned your lights on. Is that this year’s new patrol car model?”

I always keep them talking and always try to show interest in them and their job.

Don’t argue

Speeding is illegal. The officer has every right to pull me over and give me a ticket. I’m in the wrong.

I never understand people that are rude or want to argue their speed when they know that they were speeding. Kindness and truthfulness has always gotten me far, even when it’s over a speeding ticket that I deserved.

I have never seen anyone get out of a speeding ticket by arguing or harassing a police officer.

How about you?

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